How to eat chocolate the right way.

by Ronnie Watchorn

Of all the things I'd have never believed, I think the existence for a set of guidelines published by a governing body as far as how to properly eat chocolate has to take the cake. So upon learning this, it was time to do my due diligence. (Basically I called bs and then googled it.) And ladies and gents I stand corrected.
     Kinda.
     Where as there is no set of published guidelines I could find, there are some pretty standard sets of rules you can follow if you want to truly experience your favorite chocolate bars in a whole new way.
     I'm not going to deep dive into this, because honestly y'all'd probably have me committed, but I'll lay it out simply.
     Start off by grabbing a cup of room temperature water and 5-6 of your favorite chocolate bars. Splurge a little and get some good quality chocolate. Sprouts and Reasors both have a pretty solid selection of artisan chocolate brands for you to pick through.
Before getting started Ima tell you this is more fun with friends. Whether in person or through zoom, grab some friends or log in, grab that water (it needs to be room temp because cold water changes the way your tastebuds perceive the chocolate), and we can get started.
  1. Break off a piece from the bar and listen for that tell tale snap. It's a satisfying and clean sound that signifies a quality chocolate bar. How does it feel in your hands? Did it break easily? Did it break along the score lines or just randomly? How quickly did it start melting? These are all key things to pay attention to.
  2. Start by making your best hoity toity face, and stare down the bridge of your nose at it as you take a deep breath breathing it in. Feel weird smelling a chocolate bar? Yeah I get that. But what'd you smell? A rich cocoa smell? Bitter coffee? Notes of caramel or bourbon? Remember this.
  3. Put the chocolate square on your tongue. (I know I know its about damn time.) Pay attention to each flavor note as it comes through. It's a better idea to use artisan bars for this because Hersheys is a little too one dimensional for this kinda work.
  4. Now that it's melted down, push it to the roof of your mouth and breathe deep and slow while you chew. When you're chewing make sure it's slow. When you're satisfied with your flavor discoveries swallow.
  5. Wait a second before swishing some of your water around in your mouth to cleanse your palate and journal about it. It's easier to compare and contrast why you like specific bars if you journal about what you liked about them. 
     Now you get to repeat it with your other bars, I just gave you a huge excuse to eat chocolate for science. Take me up on it.
     How'd the bars compare to each other? Was there more milk or more dark? Which was the best? The worst? Did any of them have outstanding characteristics? What were they? This exercise might sound pretentious, but when done properly you get to truly experience everything a chocolate bar can offer you, and if you're looking for a chocolate tasting journal, we have some available as a complimentary gift included with our signature sampling set. It includes our signature milk, dark, and white chocolate bars and a complimentary tasting journal for you to keep track of your chocolate adventures!

That wraps us up for the day, so until next time yall!